Up comes Samhain

So up comes what has to be my most favourite time of year. I have always felt a connection to Halloween. And thats an odd thing.

Living on an island that does not celebrate this holiday at all there was a total absence of pumpkins, ghosts and goblins from my childhood days. There was, however, a feeling of something otherwordly hovering all around me between the periods of September to the end of October. At that time every year, I would get melancholy, pensive, in my analytical mood and it was only as I got older and removed myself from the prevailing mental constructs that I began to look inward more closely and analyze the moods I had.

I see the event as an opportunity to embrace things that we fear. Those dark,  decrepit feelings and moods that we are told are evil, wicked and destructive. As I grew older, I realized that there is the opportunity to take these very energies and channel them into something that may be positive. I have learnt that in time of emotional stress, or great challenge; summoning the powers of these moods assists in dealing with the seemingly great problem. The power of mischief can be very useful in dealing with fear.. mischief thought, not acted on. In this way, you control it, it doesn't control you.
I have summoned a warring spirit to deal with apathy.

None of these things, mind you required a whole lot of ritual. It was a simple matter of having felt the feeling and tapping into its strength to deal with whatever adversity was occurring at the moment.

Halloween, to me, gives permission to embrace the other side of ourselves. To look freely beyond the veil into those things that we fear, and learn to deconstruct that fear, turning it into a useful tool for taking us further spiritually.

Every year I pick one of those dark feelings in my inner self, and figure out a way to use those energies positively. I do not suppress them, for they will torture me and grow into something uncontrollable. I believe that finding a way for them to be expressed, in the context of being a useful tool is a much more appropriate way of dealing with them.

Embrace your dark side...and always remember...and ye harm none (including yourself) so mote it be.

One year more today

Haven't blogged for a while because I have been thinking about my future goals, and where I have come from to where I am heading.
Ironically, with all my wish for a life transformation (the kind of OMG! event that really has your life change) I am at heart a home body. My birthday present list runs more along the line of experiences...things are only temporary....experiences cause growth and stay with you. Some of the experiences I would like to have are:

1) The feeling of being a Sweepstakes Winner
2)The feeling of accomplishing something huge
3) The feeling of contributing to a great shift in the mental perception of some issue
4) The feeling of having the freedom to go wherever, whenever and not be bound my obligations, responsibilities and duties for a while..(Vacation away from home?)

I had set out this year to make these my to do list, however I have not accomplished even one. Number 2 is a possibility this year or early next year.
Still working on learning to "Think only what I wish to experience," and that is by far a most difficult task.

Beautiful Magic Boxes

Beautiful work by Elaine of Magic Boxes. Follow her blog with instructions here:
Magic boxes Blog
Or go to her website here:
Magic Boxes

Creative Furniture

Just posted this because I love it and I thought I'd share it.

Tim Burton

And another from the Tim Burton archives.......a delightful little animated film, said to be his first. Love the poem...most chanty.....

Tim Burton wedding cake

I am a huge Tim Burton fan, and couldn't resist this cake. I want one!!!!!!!!!
This is the perfect wedding cake for my dark side.....hmmmmmm now where can I find a victim...I mean groom........

Energies combine

Two paths has been emerging within my psyche, and at first I was looking at them seperatly, but now I see how they have been coming together slowly. Now I see where all the experiences before would have reached this point eventually.

The two issues which have been coming to a head are:

1) My creative side wishes to create something of mastery...something beyond the current mind. Something that requires me reaching further than myself.

2) My magickal mind wishes to seek something with a deeper meaning. It wishes to know something fully to the point of mastering the topic or issue...a deepening of faith or magickal connection.

And the two are related. Looking back at my life's journey I realized because what I sought, was far away from the mainstream of my experience, I had to sample bits and peices to eventually reach this point of knowing where my passion lies and understanding what I was meant to do with these experiences I have gathered.

One of Deborah Lipp's books highlights the problem I have in my mind. As an eclectic seeker I have walked among many magickal paths. But my eclectic mind seems to gloss over the details, getting the "jist" of the topic, and not seeking the deeper detailed meaning behind every line, every symbol and every hand gesture.
As she puts it :

Best of Traditional Wicca
Structured ritual: This imparts confidence to the participants; in a word, they know what they are doing. It engenders thoughtfulness. Traditional Wiccans are taught that each part of the ritual and each rule is there for a reason, so they tend to look for the reasons within ritual. Traditional rituals tend to have an overarching logic; the whole thing holds together.

In her analysis of the methods of approaching the Eclectic ways; she comments:

Worst of Eclectic Wicca
Dilution: A Wicca that allows everything and has no inherent rules can be very watered down and tepid, and eclectic ritual sometimes reflects this.

Now there are arguments against this very theory which Lipp herself outlines in her book: The Study of Witchcraft, but these are the point that resonate with me currently in my present state of mind.

From this point on, I am building a foundation for the future. It's the time for it. Saturn is in my Sun sign.... the energies are coming together. I want something less flighty, with more meaning. I want to create a strong solid foundation from which I can launch my future. Now that I know where I want to go, now that I have given up the traveling all over my brain, and trying different things, and I know the paths I want to be on, and I know the street where I want to live... so to speak.
I have realized my fear "triggers" and have dissolved their power, conquering my demons so to speak. I have explored all the other distractions and have found them lacking.

 Where I am heading now, I am heading because I know that this is where I am meant to go.....like going home....where my heart is...... Blessed Be.

                         

To cast or not to cast..or maybe how can I cast?????

My mind is still out on this one. I have been robbed.....they took my digital cameras and my cell phone. Now how can I cast a spell to force them to return them??
My mind is twisting and turning and weaving today. My intent for the spell is revenge....bad that is....as much as I think about charming my items so that they will be returned...I realize that I may be interfearing with a beings free will....wish I could freak the living daylights out of the buggers. Wish I could send a message that would curl the hair on their eyebrows in fear.
But that will be harming a person......
How do you weave a spell, which does not seem vengeful, or does not interfere with the person's free will, on a robber who stole something from you?  "An it harm none" so doesn't apply........

I could do a spell for Justice...but Justice does as Justice will do....meaning that any unresolved injustices I have done will come back to be settled with me. Not that I can think of any deliberate injustice I have done on anyone......but then some actions which are noble can cause reactions which are not.

Sigh........ my mind wrestles with the ethics of this one......better to just let it go...and let the Goddess handle this in the manner she sees fit.
Will do some protection spells on the house for now.

Back after a spell

I know I have seemed "missing in action over the past month, I do apologize. My laptop's harddrive had gone to the netherworlds and I had no real access on which to blog. Cannot imagine blogging at my day job. I can just see the looks on people's faces ..."My boss is a witch???" For sure no one will be objective or open minded in their dealings with me.

In the mean time my mind had turned to things of a more practical nature..I have been creating stitching witchery LOL ...okay sewing, and brushing up on those skills. Also my family has been taking a lot of my mental space. Single moms tend to have to think for more all.

The above pic is the cover of a magazine I found lately. Altantis Rising looks at alternative possibilities of explanations for our existence, history, science etc...it requires serious open-mindedness and makes a great read.

For the Trinis, yes I found it here. In Ellerslie Plaza's Drug Store in Maraval...just by chance. Its available online too. Google it.

The other series here is Wooden Books which I think I have mentioned before. You can buy the PDF of the book directly from them, or order the book at Amazon by clicking the link below.
I know for local witches finding research material is difficult, and expensive. I understand. 


......Hmmmm.....perhaps we should consider a book rental system...but I am hesitant to get any pages ripped out from my sweeties....you know how they are.
Anyway, I am back online, and the information would keep coming..........

Dark Moon Banishing Spell

Several issues came up which had me in a mental magickal analysis recently. A conbination of unwarrented fears, and headaches, and gossipy stories by former co-workers led me to take a quiet moment to do some inner work.

Having gone through a period of unexplainable "dumbness"...I mean three weeks of feeling utterly stupid...brain fog, lack of clarity, and just....well, unable to rouse my connection with the Goddess for reading, and creating.....awfull.
Some gossips in the office let out that two former co-workers had assumed that because I was a witch, I had cast a hex on them. Taking steps to protect themselves they went to a local "obeah man" to "wuk a zeppy" on me to protect themselves.

Well......of all the stupid.....anyway......I have far better things to do with magcik than to use it against someone. I would rather, in any competitive station, do the spell to boost my performance-psych up my mind- to be able to achieve my goals. I don't like interfering with the free will of any being, physical or otherwise. Thats my personal decision. Read into it what you wish.

So.......for cautions sake I decided to wait for the Dark moon to do a banishing spell, which would cover all bases.
9th June 2010 - Moon was in Taurus....so I decided to throw in another anxiety I had about poverty...for good measure.
NOTE: Always phrase you spells in the present. Always make the wording read that it is already so.
Other points: You can burn a black candle to banish negative energies, but burn a white candle after to fill the void. Or do what I do and use a white candle anyway.

So I lit a white candle, and a stick of incense and chanted the spell while circling my hand over the candle flame in a widdershins direction.

Chant:


"Poverty is no longer here
Anxiety now disappears
My mind no longer holds a fear
Dark Moon hears my prayer"


While doing this I also had visualizations of each are of negativity leaving my mind as balls of glowing darkness....they flew off into the night, and I mentally sent a shot of energy to blow them up and diffuse them. A child like creative mind to deal with these silly things really works I have found.

A week later, there is a firey energy within me, work duties are clear as a bell, planning skills are so strong.....my energy is positive.
Must remember to repeat a banishing spell to clear any discord during the dark moon. Just incase any other person jumps to conclusions about me.

Frankincense - 1 Pound Bag

Best Incense for banishing spells.

Great series from Wooden Books

Drrool over this fantastic series from Wooden Books. Their illustrations and choice of topics, research...oh...and did I say illustrations?????
In short, the presentation is fantastic, and they do have online download options. You can pay for the PDF file and down load it.

Link to the site:

Wooden Books    


Or you can buy it at Amazon with the following link:
The Alchemist's Kitchen: Extraordinary Potions & Curious Notions (Wooden Books)

Hate in the name of Jesus Christ

It saddens me to write this blog this morning. I use the blog sometimes as a tool to help me gather my thoughts and get my feelings out, as there are some issues which I do not have an empathic outlet for.

It hurts, when a family member takes the position that you are to be discarded from their lives because you do not believe the same things that they do. A relative, who I would describe as very close, has been growing increasingly distant because I do not conform to the "correct" cookie cutter lifestyle that they all subscribe to. You know that one...girl grows up meets boy, lives happily ever after with 2.3 children, sends all to the right Catholic private schools, goes to church every week, sticks to the marriage whether its healthy or not..gives the ultimate sacrifice of giving up themselves to take care of the husband and the kids......the type of life we were taught was the "correct" way to live.

I am sure they sit around that table at lunch central and list all the atrocious things I have done...divorced, moved in with a man, had children for two....threw the man out too.......oh the shock and horror!

Recently, the individual sent what I would describe as gay bashing hate mail, and asked several of our family members to pass it on if we stand up for Jesus Christ. I am sure Christ is "turning over in His grave" as they say here.

A few of us, in protest, questioned the individual's justification for it, and replied to the email expressing our thoughts and beliefs. The long and short of the matter ends in me being chastised for "lack of belief" and the individual "blessingly" attempting to manipulate as one would a child. Needless to say I responded.....as gently as I could, that I refuse to spread hate mail, and yes it irks me when Christians use scripture to justify hate and prejudice. And..I also have every right to believe what I believe...whether it is defined or not.

But the long and the short of it is that if you are asking me to hate in the name of Jesus, or to spread hate in the name of Jesus...then I would not ever subscribe to your idea of Jesus Christ.


House rebuffs claims of Religious Right in hate-crimes vote.(PEOPLE & EVENTS): An article from: Church & State

Wait a minute! I've been here before!

Talk about being trapped in a cycle. I am creating a book which pulls together essays from my blogs and journals, and had to browse through them to pull out the appropriate material. Most of my journals have mundane stuff and griping. Its how I relieve stress sometimes. But what was glaringly obvious is that, even after 5 years, the issues which I had then are the same issue I have now.

I haven't grown? I haven't moved forward? Such a revelation gave me another headache instantly! As if I hadn't already been battling headaches enough!Themes which came forward are:
1) Didn't like managing and working for people
2) I wish for enough money (in the millions) so that I could pursue my dream
3) The blissful state I feel when doing my biggest love and wishing I could do it full time

You know, I could kick myself. I haven't done anything in five years to say that I have moved on from those issues or grown. I saw where I kept going around and around in circles. Leaving the job, trying to start a business, not having enough money, having to go back to work, hating the job, leaving the job, trying to start a business, not having enough..... you get the point.

I know that I have to work for myself. I know that I can. What I have to plan is the products which I can create using these images that I paint. I also need to find some way to cut down my expenses to make it more feasible. Hmmm.... I must break this nightmarish cycle. Its starting to feel like a really bad dream.