your reality is a reflection of yourself

So besides the Law that "Thoughts become Things" there is the other Law in Magick that says "your reality is a reflection of yourself." In other words, what you experience around you is a reflection of what you are giving.
In my position at work I interact with a lot of people, who struggle on a daily basis to get their tasks done because of what I saw as their inability to see the bigger picture.

Two days ago I realised that I was guilty of doing exactly what I detest, which is spreading negative energies about people. In attempting to deal with an issue caused by these coworkers that I supervise, I sometimes vent to other workers close by. It did occur to me that the ventees may also go and vent to others and the negative opinion about a person is being spread, beginning with me.

I made the decision to stop the venting. I also began realizing that the lack of experience was not their fault. They cannot be blamed for the level of guidance they recieved in the matter. However, I can certainly be blamed for recognizing the issue at hand, and failing to correct it at the root, and guide them in the right direction.

I changed my outlook that day. Each person has a talent in their own right. Each person has an asset which makes them valuable to the company. I can focus on that asset and build on the positive...making their strengths stronger, and also, by focus, giving them the skills they need to maximize that talent they have.
I need to acknowledge their weaknesses and find a way to work around them, still getting them to accomplish their task.

My new mantra is " each person is a creative and talented individual. And it is my duty to find those talents and help them to blossom. By steering them down the path of their talents, I believe I would have a happier team.

In this way, I would emmitt less frustration, and thus receive less frustration from my coworkers. The cycle would then be stopped, by my shift in outlook.

Reflections

The later part of this year was one long spell becoming manifest. I watched while a spell I casted took effect and did not realize the emotional and mental challenge that it would have on me, while I adjusted to this new role.
That's another thing to note. You can cast a spell, or wish, and have it come true.....but you never realise the feelings that have to be processed in order to accomodate this change in your life. Can you inhale some of the bewilderment and grief of letting go of the old? Can you then process that letting go, in time for the new happenings of joy and contentment that are slipping in at the same time? Can you process two completely contrary feelings at the same time? You need to, when a spell is coming to pass.

It has taken six months for the effects of the spell to settle, and at the other end of that doorway, now, I am finally calming down. I used to feel something to the equivalent of being on EMOTIONAL CRACK...... high on a feeling constantly and not always in a good way. Sometimes my mind switched to "happy happy joy joy bunny on cocaine" in order to deal with my low points.

One of the most difficult things to do during the period was to reassert the goal while in the middle of heartbreak. "You wanted something...and this is part of getting that something."

I never suspected for a moment that the outcome was what would happen. But the greater good was always on my mind. The happier more contented me was always the goal. And I am glad for that resolve...I am now in a better place.

Stuck in a rut

I feel stuck in a rut. I feel like all the plans I have decided I was going to do are still very much up in the air. I made all these decisions, and haven't done a damned thing about them. If I were a psychic though, I would say that somewhere around 1:43 am this morning I woke up with a sense that something in the Universe had shifted. At that time, I felt elated...like a child waking up at Yuletide morn with the expectations of presents. Like something was going to be given to make everything seem like the world was great once again.

This morning though, I woke up with a feeling of incredible lonleyness, same as I went to bed with last night. About 10 pm last night I was on the computer with the feeling to search, although I had no idea what I was searching for. The realization that there was no one I could reach out to was painful and worrying, and it kept me up till close to midnight. Tried calling a few friends, but everyone was asleep....duh!!!

I know the feeling though. It is a familiar one for me. It begins as a feeling of lacking, of wanting, and then it gravitates to my need to reach out to someone to feel connected to something wider. Then I realize there is no one to connect to that has the answers to my questions. No one can tell me which choice to make to be happy. Everything has a huge question mark with it. How do we get past this predicament. Could one just settle their minds to be happy come what ever happens?

Did that for the last decade there abouts and was not truly happy, so that doesn't work. Why do I have this fear that life is short, and if I don't make a decision now, life would just escape me?

Indecision is the worst hurdle that I ever encounter, and it has the ability to make me wonder in circles for years.......and I don't think I have time for that anymore.

Obsessive Tendencies

Tree of Obsessions - by Cinzia Bacilieri


So I have a tendency to obsess on an issue. Its absolutley ridiculous actually that I feel like I want to slap myself. I would begin just to try to analyze a topic, and then it would grow in my mind to a huge big deal.

For any Magick worker, this is a worry. I must try not to obsess, as it prevents me from looking at the wider picture, and then I cannot get into my zone.

For the past two weeks I have noticed that I have had difficulty connecting with the Goddess. I worry constantly if the decisions I make are correct, because I let pre- programmed paradigms poke fun at my decisions. They are like a pack of Demons constantly punishing me for choosing a different direction.

I wonder if I would ever rid myself of these mental programmes which were input into my brain from a child. How come I could recognised their limitations, and still be worried by them, and still have to go over them, kick them around and crunch the little buggers under me feet.

Yet, they pop up again like the annoying bastards that they are........ maybe if I create a mental Trash Bin and throw them in there for 5 points, I could make a game out of getting rid of these limiting paradigms. Hmmmm my inner child would love that...LOL