Family Relations

How do you handle a person who is supposed to be your guide and encouragement, but instead seems to delight in unsettling your peace of mind, or making you believe that your life is all wrong?

How do you handle a parent who seems to take delight in gloating when things go wrong with you?
How do you handle it when, whenever you are happy, they seem to want to ensure that you are rocked from your secure place?

This is definately a toxic relationship. No matter who the person is, anyone who fits this pattern cannot possibly have your best interest at heart.

The attempt to put distance between myself and this person has failed many a time. I have almost reached the stage of asking this person not to come near me again. The only thing is that I fear I may be over-reacting.

Again, I am reminded that my emotions are my own. It is my own fault that I allow this person to unsettle my peace-of-mind. It is my own fault that I allow this person to control my emotions.

your reality is a reflection of yourself

So besides the Law that "Thoughts become Things" there is the other Law in Magick that says "your reality is a reflection of yourself." In other words, what you experience around you is a reflection of what you are giving.
In my position at work I interact with a lot of people, who struggle on a daily basis to get their tasks done because of what I saw as their inability to see the bigger picture.

Two days ago I realised that I was guilty of doing exactly what I detest, which is spreading negative energies about people. In attempting to deal with an issue caused by these coworkers that I supervise, I sometimes vent to other workers close by. It did occur to me that the ventees may also go and vent to others and the negative opinion about a person is being spread, beginning with me.

I made the decision to stop the venting. I also began realizing that the lack of experience was not their fault. They cannot be blamed for the level of guidance they recieved in the matter. However, I can certainly be blamed for recognizing the issue at hand, and failing to correct it at the root, and guide them in the right direction.

I changed my outlook that day. Each person has a talent in their own right. Each person has an asset which makes them valuable to the company. I can focus on that asset and build on the positive...making their strengths stronger, and also, by focus, giving them the skills they need to maximize that talent they have.
I need to acknowledge their weaknesses and find a way to work around them, still getting them to accomplish their task.

My new mantra is " each person is a creative and talented individual. And it is my duty to find those talents and help them to blossom. By steering them down the path of their talents, I believe I would have a happier team.

In this way, I would emmitt less frustration, and thus receive less frustration from my coworkers. The cycle would then be stopped, by my shift in outlook.

Reflections

The later part of this year was one long spell becoming manifest. I watched while a spell I casted took effect and did not realize the emotional and mental challenge that it would have on me, while I adjusted to this new role.
That's another thing to note. You can cast a spell, or wish, and have it come true.....but you never realise the feelings that have to be processed in order to accomodate this change in your life. Can you inhale some of the bewilderment and grief of letting go of the old? Can you then process that letting go, in time for the new happenings of joy and contentment that are slipping in at the same time? Can you process two completely contrary feelings at the same time? You need to, when a spell is coming to pass.

It has taken six months for the effects of the spell to settle, and at the other end of that doorway, now, I am finally calming down. I used to feel something to the equivalent of being on EMOTIONAL CRACK...... high on a feeling constantly and not always in a good way. Sometimes my mind switched to "happy happy joy joy bunny on cocaine" in order to deal with my low points.

One of the most difficult things to do during the period was to reassert the goal while in the middle of heartbreak. "You wanted something...and this is part of getting that something."

I never suspected for a moment that the outcome was what would happen. But the greater good was always on my mind. The happier more contented me was always the goal. And I am glad for that resolve...I am now in a better place.