Thursday, April 9, 2015

Time to shine

TIME TO SHINE!

It took so long to be finally living the dream of being a full time artist. Work is finally selling at a rate where I can pay my bills. I am very very grateful to the universe that things are where they are now.
There are days where happiness and contentment flood through my spirit and leave me with such an incredibly buoyant feeling.

Stay tuned to this blog for more artwork to be posted soon.

My spiritual journey so far has been very erattic. I have no label for what I practice....if I actually practice anything at all anymore.

My biggest Spiritual practice seems to be a lot of thinking and developing a lot of patience.

....and being silent.......sharing nothing of my goals with anyone, save one friend. I have recognized that NO negative thought can creep into my head about any of my plans. The smallest doubt can snowball and eat away at my will.

I have decided it time to shine!
Me....gonna work really hard to expose the work that I do and hope that I can shine my light through it.

Blessed Be.......

Tuesday, April 7, 2015

Where I am now....and the meaning of life.

Spirit Flight
I leapt.
I took the plunge
Three months later I am a full time artist.
I am at peace, enjoying every every day and waking up to the next adventure all the time. Living your passion really makes all the difference in the world. You truly feel like you are living.

Yes...that is one of my paintings.

A friend and I were recently contemplating the Meaning of Life. You know....THAT question. I believe we will all have a different answer to that question. Life means different things to different people.
Same friend pointed out an article in brainpicking.org which discusses Tolstoy's view on life. His conclusion...after a couple years of deliberating and looking at the question again and again.....was that it was difficult to grasp the meaning of something infinite, when viewing it in finite terms.

Humans cannot fathom the infinite nature of LIFE in itself.....the existence of all that IS......especially when viewing it from a fullstop-in-time lifespan of the human being. We can only see meaning from our limited perspective. I believe we decide for ourselves what that meaning is.

I do not think there is a meaning. LIFE just is........
LIFE IS........

We are in it for the journey......and I think we had better stop holding on to the temporary, and look at the bigger picture.
LIFE...in my current manifestation, can only be meant to be experienced and enjoyed.  Keep and open mind and let it carry you where you would be happiest. Once you have made that decision, and felt that happiness, its impossible to accept anything less.

What do you think is the Meaning Of LIFE? I would love to hear some of your responses.

Sunday, January 26, 2014

Mind Cauldron Bubbles

Just wanted to put out some random bubblings. None of them are really connected.

When you rely on people to do most things for you, you may be in danger of giving them your own power. - October 5th 2013


Quote from Terry Pratchett in Witches Abroad. - What is a god? A focus of belief. If people believed, a god began to grow. - 

" When spreading the cards, you always had a pre-concieved idea of what would happen. You never let the cards tell their own story; you were trying to make them confirm what you imagined you knew - Brida, Paulo Coelho


Thursday, October 31, 2013

Samhain Thoughts

Skyclad 
Dance! Dance! ..... the wheel has made yet another turn........so we end and begin again. Blessed be to all who read this post and re-commit to the Ways of the Craft, the ways of old, as old as mankind themselves.

Those who walk this journey understand the cycle. Those who follow the Moon Tradition and seek her blessings monthly, attempting to tune their energies to their surroundings....for harmony....always harmony...Blessings to you, your ancestors and all who helped you reach to this point.

We remember the cycle. That never ending process of creation, transformation, endings that bring beginnings. We understand that every death nourishes life. Like the dead in the ground that cause the plants to flourish, and are consumed by beings, who are ultimately nourished by the dead.....to bring life......transforming what once was into life yet again.

The Cycle keeps going, the wheel keeps turning. You are a compilation of all that was before you, all who have died
to nourish your living body. Give thanks, and bless all that cross your path.

Blessed Samhain. :)

Saturday, October 5, 2013

The Circle Comes around again



Magickal growth is like a spiral. You travel along the path, and sometimes revisit old issues. But you see these old issues in a new light because of the growth you experienced in the past. You are higher up the ladder of that issue....solving it becomes closer and closer.....till it no longer is an issue.

 Learning, I suppose, can be like that. Each time you revisit a theory, you see something there that you did not see before and you knowledge of the thing expands.

The reason I am going down this discussion is because I feel the need to do it all over again. Witchcraft learning, from scratch. Now that I know what I know perhaps I will see something more.
To begin again, without the giddy headed elation, with out the giggly happiness feeling of finding a new paradigm. To approach witchcraft with a seriousness that was not there before, and re-absorb the knowledge and the principles which were looked at already.
One thing I found in my previous journey is that there was not enough lore, wise words, or daily inspiration for one walking the path. Perhaps I would find some this time or be able to write some using the base energies that swirl around every issue.
Travelling the world is hard enough, one needs a code to live by. Even though I am aware that searching for the code can lock ones mind into a lifestyle which does not leave a mind open to other possibilities, I am willing to take the journey of learning again.
Maybe I will make some more new rules.......so I begin again.

Sunday, August 25, 2013

Quantum Infinity




Every so often all the information that runs in and out of my mind will combine into an idea, or and image. (In case you did not know, I paint as well)

Recently I had the opportunity to see images from the Hubble Telescope which extended far out beyond where our eyes can see from the Earth. As the camera took us deeper and deeper into space, the vastness of what we conceived as “Space” really boggled my mind. Watching each speck move past, and learning that these were not stars, not planets or solar systems, but galaxies! Each speck holding millions of stars and worlds itself!



Now mix that in your head with a picture, comparing the sizes of the star ANTARES, with other stars and our sun, of which our sun is barely seen- Jupiter is invisible at that ratio….and well Earth would be near microscopic!


Now add a dash of Quantum theory, where we are observing quantum particles which are affected by the observer, with our consciousness having an effect on the physical reality of the quantum particle.

Then….like a slap to my insight….Earth being invisible in relation to Antares got me thinking……if we are observing quantum particles and our ability to effect change on them, who’s to say that we (Earth really) is not a quantum particle in relation to some other “Being”, whose consciousness has an effect on our existence. Gods you say? All well and good, but those “gods” can be quantum particles to another being larger than they….and so upward…or inward; depending on how you look at it? As above, so below comes to mind.

Horton hears a Who seemed to illustrate this beautifully. Very amazing if you think about the possibilities!


Friday, August 9, 2013

Fear

I am currently exploring a person. Its a beautiful feeling, these emotions. He is the kind of man that has depth of personality, strength of conviction, confidence, compassion, and courage.....

Sometime gone the FEAR kicked in that the relationship would turn sour, or that I would put in all this effort emotionally and eventually have to walk away ..alone.

And I allowed the fear to work its way in, and tried to press him for a commitment too soon....and what was a fun, playful and enjoyable energy; became strained and full of tension.
Then exactly what I FEARED was created.


Then I watched EARTH today, and heard this : "Fear is not real. The only place that fear can exist is in our thoughts of the future. It is a product of our imagination, causing us to fear things that at present do not and may not ever exist. Fear is a choice."

...causing us to fear things that at present do not and may not even happen........my imagination was running overboard! I did not corral my anxiety...and wham!

I needed to process this, because I saw..through someone else's eyes, the panicky, cling woman that was a turn off to me. Thankfully, he is a gentle soul, who calmly expressed that I was not sure about what I wanted, and that I needed time. He is still there....still supportive, just we are not in relationship mode. A thing I miss very much.... just in case he happens to read my blog. :)

These were my thoughts:

1) I was afraid that my emotional investment would be for nothing.
            - So... I was loving in the hope that I get something out of it? What about unconditional love? Why do I assume that because I put out I must get something back? Do you truly care for this person, or do you see this person as someone who could probably fill your emotional needs, a mere tool to make you comfortable?

2) I decided an ALL or Nothing at all approach may have gotten me what I wanted.
       -So....I threw an emotional tantrum, locked up the access to any contact...because I was taught that if I let him miss me, he will respect me and give me what I want. Looking back I realize this is emotional manipulation....and now I miss his touch, miss his kiss, and I have created an insecurity in him and damaged the trust between us. He decided to protect his heart and pulled back. I cannot blame him.

3) My emotions (fear) skewed my reality.
      -This straight forward honest man, who indicated upfront that he was not ready for a committed relationship; but that he enjoyed spending time with me, talking to me, and sharing everything with me. That he is very comfortable around me, and very attracted to me, but was not ready to fall in love, he wanted to know me better. MY FEAR turned those words into ... "Hey...I think you're hot and would be happy to fool around with you for a while, but don't ask me to commit to you at all okay? And don't pressure me to do anything for you either."...JEEZ

Only now do I realize that I actually had EXACTLY what I wanted. I stupidly allowed FEAR to get into my head, and toy at my perception of reality. ...and now, I have lost what I had.
Some serious emotional maturity is needed. I am not in touch with myself. I do not "see" the reality of a situation.

Also...and this is very important, I realize I assess relationships success according to rigid fixed models, which may not work for every situation. I lack the patience to learn the person properly, and allow the energies between us to mix and become its own thing. I want to define how it should be mixed, according to these fixed models in my head.

It is a recipe for relationship disaster.

Which reminded me of another quote: Things fall into harmony when you always stay allowing of what arises, without resisting it.

I need to stop resisting a relationship's natural progressing and let it be what it was meant to be.

Blessed BE.